20130629 – Nadine Tolstoy’s first meeting with Baba

Nadia Tolstoy was the daughter-in-law of Count Leo Tolstoy, the Russian author of War and Peace. She was living with her husband Ilya outside of New York City. She had studied music at the University of Petrograd and spoke several languages. Interested in mystical literature and esoteric philosophy, Nadia was a sincere seeker of divinity; but merely reading books had not satisfied her and she was in search of a living Master.

Nadia and Ilya became friends with Malcolm and Jean Schloss. When they wrote to her of Meher Baba’s visit, she came to Harmon for his blessing on November l9th. No sooner had she set eyes on Baba than she exclaimed, “My search is over!”

Nadia Tolstoy was later nicknamed Nadine by Baba.  The following is her account of that first meeting:

As I climbed the steps to his upper room, I remember chanting “Om.” I entered the room. Stretched on the couch at the far side of the room was that mysterious, long-expected Being, the Divine Enigma – the True One!

Simple, light, thin, small, sparkling and youthful, so unpretentious, but strangely mysterious and clear. He had an almost boyish look, but gazing from high and afar, unfathomably deep, yet smiling with pure light in his shining eyes. Impenetrable, impersonal transparency – purity!

He reminded me of something, of somebody, I knew far off but could not catch the vision of. I felt as if he were challenging my inner memory; his whole posture and atmosphere demanded, “Can’t you remember? Don’t you remember me from the past?” I felt he was my life, my resurrection.

Baba spelled on the board, “You have been waiting for me a long time and now I have come. I will help you.” Nadine started to tell Baba about herself, but he interrupted, “I know all,” and simply repeated, “I will help you.”

Nadine had been practicing certain spiritual disciplines – kriya yoga under Swami Yogananda. Baba explained to her with a very serious look, “It is not for the West – not for you.” He then asked her to sit silently with him for a few minutes. The following is Nadine’s recollection:

During the short meditation with Baba, I knew he was helping me, reading me. All the time, I felt his eyes seeing into the depths beyond that which we can see, reading the open book of me – working within me. I knew he was my Master.
His immediate recognition of my soul created a feeling of absolute confidence. Comforted, I already knew that he was the True One who knows and who can help. He was like the shining sun that we do not question. He simply and naturally entered into my life and into my hidden being.

As I departed, suddenly it became clear that he was Krishna. His happy, serene appearance and all his mannerisms conveyed something undefinable that I yet seemed to recognize. The truth of his loving understanding, the immediacy of direct response given with so much love and practical instructions have been a gift of God to me, setting my heart at peace.

I had an absolute confidence that now my path was found and the Supreme Guru was here.

-www.lordmeher.org, p1483

(For detailed account, refer http://www.meherbabatravels.com/his-close-ones/women/nadine-tolstoy/)

Photo courtesy: Lord Meher

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